i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
Randomize
