i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
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