My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize
