yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
i like how i just referred to his pregnant wife as the "other" melissa and you didn't even judge me.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Randomize
