any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
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