you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
Randomize
