That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
