Apparently on the way out of the ER i asked the nurse to doggie-bag me some more morphine.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Randomize
