I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
23 Parents Gave Awful Advice about “The Birds and the Bees”
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
These 19 Deaths Are Ironically Hilarious
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.