I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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