She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
Randomize
