quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
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