Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
Oh I had the weirdest dream in which I was an archeologist stealing a golden dildo from a snobby British person
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