If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Randomize
