In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
Randomize
