i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
my god I love twenty year old dicks
I need mimosas to revive my soul
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
Randomize
