one two three fourrrrnication!
i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
Randomize