i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
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