Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
Tried to buy Xanax from my boss last night. Wrong Mike.
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
Randomize