So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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