I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
when I was too drunk to walk on my own two feet, he stole a shopping cart from the grocery store at the corner and proceeded to wheel me back to my apartment.
Then he tucked me in, gave me a goodnight kiss and slept on my sofa. I woke up this morning and he was making waffles.
he is a god among men.
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
Woke up with chlamydia and a bruised rib. I'd say my boss is gonna be mad about me not showing up to work, except you know.. it's her fault.
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
Randomize
