Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
Randomize
