xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
You're the Michael Phelps of my vagina. Most decorated Fuckolympian of all time.
Am I going to be on condom boxes?
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
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