If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
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