they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
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