Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
I'm, like, this 🤏🏼 close to buying crocs
And you're also 🤏🏼 to never putting your dick inside me again
Randomize
