He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Randomize
