I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
Princesses don't give blow jobs
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
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