Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
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