did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Randomize