i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
Randomize
