First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
Oh my god. Just had sex with this girl on the boardroom table at my work at midnight (win!) just realized I left the condom wrapper on the table (lose!)
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Randomize
