He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
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