I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
she was pretty much dry humping my leg when her boyfriend walked in. he says "you should probably leave." all i could come up with was "YEAH, I KNOW!"
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
Randomize