I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
swear to god, just saw some chick dressed in a full chicken costume buying eggs and telling the cashier that she "just wants her babies back."
buy whatever she's on. a lot of it.
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
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