When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
