We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
i think im in europe. pls send help
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Randomize