I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
