is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
Randomize
