she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
Randomize