The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning
1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
Randomize
