He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
I asked him if his doormat had a name, then proceeded to sit on it for the next 30 minutes while signing that magic carpet ride song from aladdin.
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
I would ride that face into the sunset
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
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