I hope mine doesn't look like that
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
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