just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
At least life still wants to fuck me.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
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