well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
My ex came to my place while I was gone. Random things he took: snow shoes, my laundry quarters, a decorative picture, all my condiments, the container that held my rice and a sticker off my wallet. Then left a note saying he watered my plants and fed my cats. What. The. Fuck.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
Randomize
