i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
She guessed my name 9 times, and 5 of those times she guessed Mike. Figured that'd be an easy target for the night.
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
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