I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
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