Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
Randomize
