So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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