i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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