Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Randomize
